A man and a woman were asleep like two innocent babies. Suddenly, at 3 o'clock in the morning, a loud noise came from outside.
The woman, bewildered, jumped up from the bed and yelled at the man 'Holy crap. That must be my husband!'
So the man jumped out of the bed; scared and naked jumped out the window. He smashed himself on the ground, ran through a thorn bush and to his car as fast as he could go.
A few minutes later he returned and went up to the bedroom and screamed at the woman, 'I AM your husband!'
The woman yelled back, 'Yeah, then why were you running?'
And then the fight started.....
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My wife asked me if a certain dress made her butt look big. I told her Not as much as the dress that she had worn yesterday.
And then the fight started.....
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One year, a husband decided to buy his mother-in-law a
cemetery plot as a Christmas gift.
The next year, he didn’t buy her a gift.
When she asked him why, he replied, “Well, you still haven’t
used the gift I bought you last year!”
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I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside
the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and
little things just seem funny? Yeah, well I couldn’t believe it. He was a DWARF!!! He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted,‘I AM NOT HAPPY!!!’
So, I looked down at him and said, ‘Well, then which one are
you?’
And that’s when the fight started....
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